Silent Night, Holy Night
by kiba kai
Summary: Duo was alone in Chrismas Eve, who would he think about?... Short/Chrismas FIC (2+5, Shounen Ai) *Revise Epilogue*
1. Silent Night Holy Night

Disclaimer : I don't own them, no... thanks Sunrise

Pairing : 2+5, 3+4 implied and 1+R implied too ^^'

Category : Sap, Slight Angst, Duo POV

Rate : PG-13

Warning : Shounen ai

Timeline : AC 197 (one year after Endless Waltz)

Note : Short Fic, Enter TSFHWGS contest!

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-Silent Night, Holy Night-

By Kai 

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The snow was falling slowly outside the closed windows of the little house. From the Earth, it looked like the twisted white dotted line painted all over the dark sky. The moon was shining bright, the faint curved line on its face looked like a dancing yellow rabbit. The children all over the world were waiting for the fat man in the white beard and red suit to come and present them with the big sack of gifts and uncountable candy.

I've read those stories of Christmas Eve over and over. How many years has it been without a normal Christmas Eve in my life? Sitting together with our family, talking of your adventures in the passed year, drinking and eating together under the candlelight, waiting for the night to come. 10 years perhaps? 

All my life was spent in training; shooting and killing. I've passed through many cruel years on my own. It was like a dream. Finally, the war was over...

Yes, today was Christmas Eve but the family I had now was myself and... Chang Wufei.

Since we both worked with the Preventers; hey, all of us worked there, but sometimes I felt like we were alone. Trowa and Quatre moved away to live together. On what purpose? Jesus. You should have seen them when they started packing; they looked like a new married couple who wanted a private life. Anyway, after they left I thought at least we'd still have Heero. But, I realized later that we were wrong; Heero moved to Relena's place. Great! Great!~ 

It wasn't like I didn't want to live with Wufei but... I didn't want to live alone with him. Mmm would you please stop blushing? ... Ok! I er... I think... Oh, just forget it.

Ok! Onto the Christmas thing. Today I just went to a tree farm and bought a Christmas tree! Yey! The first one in my entire life! I bought others things from gift shop too! Candy canes, paper stars, Santa dolls. Oh, I had fun shopping for these things. The book said I should have Wine and Chicken too. Mmm... Done!

I finished preparing my little party; all I could do now was wait for him to come back. I didn't tell him about this. Surprise? No! Hell no! Chang Wufei never liked surprises. I haven't had a chance to tell him since he was on the mission but was due back today; I had hoped he would come back before dawn.

I wonder what he'll say? Would he think this stuff was stupid? He might be too tired to have a dinner with me. He might think this was a waste. I sighed. Am I a bit too worried?

I moved to the sofa next to the large window, staring out. The streetlight was lit but there were no people walking by like everyday. Maybe, everyone was in their own house, celebrating this holy night with their beloved, embracing each other from the coldness of the snow outside. Maybe. I shrugged.

It was completely a silent night for me, only the small sound of burning wood in the fireplace filled the room. I picked up the thick quilt to wrap myself in. Alone on the dark cold night wasn't easy for someone, but I thought I could handle it. It wasn't that hard for me... 

...

What? Am I crying? No, I will not cry...

...

Lie?

How could I lie? 

Yes, I was lonely, very lonely. I missed him very much but he wasn't here, but even if he was here... there was nothing I could do. I couldn't hug him, not even touch him... He wasn't mine.

I let my mind wandered to her; Sister Helen. I remembered when she held me and cradled me in her arms; she could kiss my pain away when I cried. Her smile was the only thing I treasured among the other things that happened to me back then.

I miss her, no... I just wanted someone, anyone... anyone who could replace him. But I didn't think I could find that man, maybe that man would never exist.

I wanted to talk to someone... Sister Helen, if you were here, would you listen to me?

I pictured her sitting here beside me, smiling at me, soothing my hair...

"Sister... I've found someone... Someone that I really want to spend my lifetime with... I wish you were here with me Sister, I want you to see him... I bet you'll like him."

I tried to hold back my tears and continued.

"Do you want to know him? He was very... very... kind and handsome." Oh, yeah I'm blushing. "He always wakes up early in the morning, practices his katana and makes breakfast. I love the way he cooks, Sister. I wish I could cook like him... but no, not a good idea. If I can cook he might let me do it sometime. No, no I only want to wake up and fid him standing there at the kitchen counter, his back turned to me, his black hair lose... the morning light from the left side windows shining on him, the song of little bird on the tree outside singing for him... it's... only a little thing, I know but... you don't know what it feels like, Sister. I never want those days to end. Sometimes, I'm afraid. I'm very afraid when he goes away on his missions. I can't help but worry about him. I wish we could quit our jobs... but if we quit, I don't think he would stay with me anymore, Sister. I don't know what to do."

I hugged the fluffy pillow tight; imagine it was her waist for me to hold on.

"I'm trying to be strong, Sister. Strong like you, strong like him... I hope I can keep these feelings for him inside my heart, at least for another day. Tomorrow? Even tomorrow or the following day. I will still keep it, Sister. I can't tell him."

I lowered my voice to minimum... I only could whisper... if louder than that I didn't think my mind could bare the pain anymore... "I love him, Sister."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Outside of the room, Chang Wufei heard every word... They were all the pieces of the braided boy's heart. He shut the door as quietly as possible... He couldn't remember if his lips curved into a smile or not, but he did remember the way his heart and his soul warmed with some indescribable feeling...

fin~

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Kai: yeah yeah, Christmas Fic !! What the Hell? .. mm the Christmas is next month but .. when I woke up this morning I found myself thinking of the image of Duo like this, ^^'

Feedback: yes, YES please (*^_^*)


	2. Soundless Confession

  
Disclaimer : I don't own them, no... thanks Sunrise  
Pairing : 2+5; 1+R, 3+4, 6+9 mentioned  
Category : Sap, Wufei POV, a bit of OOC   
Rate : PG-13  
Warning : Shounen ai  
Timeline : AC 197 (one year after Endless Waltz)  
Note : Sequel to " Silent Night, Holy Night "  
  
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-Soundless Confession-  
By Kai   
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Today was Christmas Eve. The people on Earth and in the Colonies celebrated this important day of Christian tradition, especially this year, since this is the first Christmas without war. I still remember; this day last year I was in Nataku. I raised my sword against my friends, against my comrades and against the world. Days and nights passed as quickly as water flowed, it's stealth the memories I wish I could forget, but days and nights also cruelly brought them back to me. I made a mistake and I couldn't erase it from my mind so easily.  
  
Later, even my friends and ex-enemies like Zechs Merquise and Lady Une treated me like that incident never happened, but it still left the scar, a deep one. In return for accepting me for who I was regardless of what I did, I devoted my life to serve the people; joining the Preventers.  
  
Yes, I know I should stop thinking like this and let it go. Maxwell always said so.  
  
I was in the jet. The mission had finished beforehand; there nothing left to do now and I went home. From the tiny window beside me I could only see the empty, dark sky... so vast, so boundless. I let my mind wonder before the attentive flight attendant informed me that we would land in 10 minutes.  
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  
  
After landing, Une sent a driver to escort me home but instead of accepting her kindness, I decided to take a walk for a while. I walked along the length of snowy shopping streets, people hand-in-hand lazily passed me by. I heard the children yelling 'Merry Christmas!' and ran after each others. I found these noises of happiness less annoying to me than it was in the old days. Maybe I've become more social?  
  
Looking around, the street was filled with the green leaves and red ribbons, decorating the entire street. Yes, this was Christmas Eve, but it was just an ordinary day for me since I'm not a Christian. The only one effect I got from this day was another day off, technically.   
  
Later, I noticed that nobody walked alone except me, it didn't surprise me much. Everybody had their date for such an important day; their families, their relatives or their lovers... I thought about Yuy and Miss Dorlian, Barton and Winner, even Marquise and Noin, what were they doing? What about Maxwell? What was he doing? I shook my head. Judging from his out-going character he might be on some dance floor or in someone's embrace...  
  
It didn't matter.  
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  
  
I must admit that I didn't want to be home right now. I could picture our home without him... so dark and quiet; the image of him smiling and waving at me slowly faded to nothing... I didn't want to be there. My footsteps were slower since I didn't know where to go anymore, and finally, it stopped... I held my head up to the sky, the snow falling slowly but continuously. I felt the coldness but it didn't come from anywhere but inside my heart.  
  
Maxwell… what did you do to me? You're messing with my head, did you know that? ... your charming smile and those laughing lips.  
  
I sighed and shook my head mindlessly, trying to wipe away this aching feeling.   
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  
  
Like it or not, I arrived at the front door. I never felt as bad as I did standing here like today. This was going to be long night. I made a mental note that Maxwell might have forgotten to turn off the lights in the living room, but it looked more like the fire from fireplace. I shrugged and inserted the key, twisted the doorknob open.  
  
I walked passed the living room but its door was slightly open and the orange light of fire escaped from the darkness. I saw him through the narrow space; he was sitting on the sofa, snuggled in the quilt that I bought a week ago.   
  
He was home.   
  
'...?'   
  
I questioned myself ... I ... I thought he wasn't here. Why should I feel content to see him? My heart beat faster than I had ever felt before... Maxwell.  
  
Anyway, why didn't he turn on the light? I was about to call him but I heard him say something... (*)  
  
...  
  
Was he... talking about me? I was stunned; my hands went cold when I heard him say he was worried about me. Should I listen to this? I lowered my eyes, ashamed of my actions; standing here and sharing his hidden side that I never saw before. But ... I bit my lower lip, I wanted to know how he felt toward me, I always wanted to know...  
  
He was whispering something... Maxwell... those words, did you mean it? ... Did you love me?  
  
...  
  
I thought my heart must have stopped for several seconds, but it was aching with the strange passion that ran through my body. What was this? Is this what they call 'love'?   
  
I shut the door as quietly as I can. I don't know what to do in this situation, but one thing for sure; my chest was throbbing... hard. I slid down the solid wall behind me, all I could do right now was sit there.  
  
He loved me.  
  
...  
  
He loved me.  
  
...  
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  
  
I wasn't sure how long that I sat there. Maybe I was too afraid to get up, or maybe I wanted to tell him how I felt too. How I felt? Did I love him too? I drew my knees up to my chest, knowing he was just beyond this wall and thinking about me was too much. Was I worthy of his love? After all the things I've done? ... I wanted to forget it; please God... let me forget it.  
  
I rested my head against the wall and reminded myself; I must forget it.  
  
I faced the wooden door and made up my mind. I never knew before that knocking on a door was this hard. There was no response after knocking.   
  
...   
  
Minutes passed and I just realized that I held my breath. I didn't want to wait anymore so I just opened it.   
  
He was there, sleeping under the thick quilt. His frame was so fragile compared to the largeness of the blanket, his braid was lying along his back... he looked like an angel.  
  
I wasn't sure if I should wake him or not but somehow I reached out my hand to touch his slim shoulder. I sighed, I felt half relive to know that he might not wake up until tomorrow morning but sleeping here wasn't good. I decided to flip him into my arms.  
  
I just wanted to carry him to his room but when his head rested against my shoulder, I couldn't help but admire him. I noticed the dried track of tears on his face, so I wiped it off gently. If he cries for me, I swear that this would be the last time.  
  
I nestled him closer and tried to lift him up but seemed like he wouldn't want to let go of the quilt so I wrapped it to him tighter, he was lighter than I expected.   
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  
  
I managed to get him on the bed, unbraided his hair so it wouldn't hurt his head when he woke up. His hair was truly beautiful, it flowing along my touch. I knelt beside his bed and placed my hand on his forehead... God, how I wanted to see him smile. I sighed in content and pressed the light kiss to the back of his hand as if I wanted him to wake up and welcome me home. I rose up from my sitting position and lowered my lips to his ear, tracing the words of love that only me in this world could hear...  
  
  
  
  
  
fin~  
  
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(*) it's in 'Silent Night, Holy Night' please read it first ^^'  
  
Kai: Thanks for all the review on 'Silent Night, Holy Night' !! You warmed my heart!! ~^_^~ SpecialThanks!! : Kimberly, AKGaston, Tasuki_no_Baka, Sparky, Rei Eien, Garnet Fire, Fela, Dark Moon and Bronze Tigress who pointed out that I should write a Sequel and especially AKGaston for the idea of Wufei's thoughts on the way home ~^_^~  
  
Feedback: yes, YES, Please... (*^_^*)  
  
  



	3. Morning After

  
Disclaimer : I don't own them, no... thanks Sunrise  
Pairing : 2+5  
Category : Sap, Wufei POV, a bit of OOC   
Rate : PG-13  
Warning : Shounen ai  
Timeline : AC 197 (one year after Endless Waltz)  
Note : Sequel to " Soundless Confession"  
  
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-Morning After-  
By Kai   
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*Duo POV*

Morning. Morning already?! What about Wufei, did he come home last night? I jerked up from my bed. ... wait. My bed? I remembered that I was waiting for him in the living room. I looked down a saw the quilt covering me neatly... it must be him. 

...

Oh, God. Did this mean he carried me here? Just the thought of his strong arms around me made me shiver. I slumped back down and hid myself under the thick blanket. Oh, no doubt; I was blushing.

Uh. I peeked out from the quilt's rim and turned to see my reflection from the large mirror beside my bed, my face was completely turned into shade of pink. God, I pulled it up over my head once again... but hey, I couldn't stay here forever, he must be making breakfast right now. I should help him.

I washed my face and studied it for a while, almost like there are 'Idiots' written all over my face. I turned my head and suddenly realized the tangle ness of my hair... Did I unbraid last night? No. Jesus! It must be him. The image of him removes my rubber band and sooth it emerged from my head, maybe he didn't do it but... Oh, Man. Was there someone die from embarrassment?! I banged my head to the nearby wall, feeling completely stupid.

I took a deep breath and changed my clothes. When I walked down the stairs, the only thing I had in my mind was; did my face go back to normal? I went to the kitchen, he wasn't there but it seemed like he already finished preparing breakfast. So, I walked stealthily to the living room...

There he was, reading the newspaper. When he heard the door opening, he turned to me. Before he could do anything, I said "Good morning, Wufei." as normal as possible but somehow I felt my face redden.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*Wufei POV*

I was sat here in the living room. What am I doing? Pretending to read newspaper, of course. He could be down here in any minutes but all I can think about right now was the entire event that happened last night; his words and my touch... I bet things wouldn't be the same after this, especially for me. 

I jumped a little at the sound of door cracking open. He was there, greeting me.

"Good morning, Maxwell." I replied. I nearly chuckle when I saw his face blushed, could I say he was cute? "Looks like you were waiting for me last night." I gestured him to the meal he left yesterday. Yes, I just warmed them all up.

"Yeah... right." 

He didn't look straight at me; I just knew that he was easy to tease. I rose up and pulled out the chair for him, he hesitatingly accepted, still avoided eye contact.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*Duo POV*

I couldn't believe it, he heat last night's meal up. 'Does this mean he wants to have a dinner with me? No, no don't try to think in the bright sight... Maybe he cares for Christian tradition...'

'But... he's Taoist. Maybe he really wants to join me last night but couldn't make it in time...'

...

'What the hell I am thinking... Damn it! I'm panicking! I must say something to him, anything, but what it should be?: Thanks Wu-man? Oh! the breakfast looks familiar? What the fuck did you do last night? Or just 'I love you'? ...

Hell, I need some air. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*Wufei POV*

I saw him take a deep breath like he was going to say something important, and finally he said, "Merry Christmas, Wufei."

I did giggle this time.

"What!" 

"No, no." I waved my hand. "Merry Christmas, Duo."

  
fin~  
  
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Kai: Thanks Bronze Tigress!! it's her idea to make this trilogy and kindly suggest me many thingssss ~^_^~

  
On to the Sequel : Unbreakable (Valentine Fic) 


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